I went to Vegas. It was the diamond's bachelor party.
woman of unnamed occupation: so who's the best man?
me: uh... uh... I guess that's me.
To see our gloriously fine suits, you'll have to make do with the picture above. Until we wear them again.
post-Vegas:
me: yeah, the trip was perfect, exactly what it was supposed to be: lots of glorious stupid masculinity. but it was starkly centering, too. I mean, it was like, okay, vegas is *not* my town. that's not who I am.
blue: is it anyone's town?
Song of the Day: Neil Young - On the Way Home
I stayed at work pretty late last night, till around closing time for the bars here in Tucson. This always makes for an entertaining bike ride home, since my route goes by most of the bar scene.
At an intersection with a separate bike line in the center, a car pulls up to me next to me.
the driver (slurred): hey! is that a cop car behind me?
me: um, no... that's a pickup truck.
the driver: okay, great.
She then peels out, jumping the curb into an illegal left turn.
I bike down through a two-lane underpass, and I'm immediately surrounded by 5-6 cars all zipping past me, laying on their horns and yelling to me and each other. I can't hear anything they're saying over their horns, but they seem pretty excited about it. Meanwhile, I'm figuring one of them is going to hit me, and I'm just wondering if it will be by accident or on purpose. Then a cop car pulls out from out of nowhere and slides into the middle of their pack. I'm thinking, okay, I guess I'm gonna witness a DUI bust... But the cop just drives along with them as they keep speeding, yelling, and laying on their horns. I'm not really sure what he was looking for.
I was pretty excited to get back to my quiet, pitch-dark, and very safe neighborhood street (above).
Song of the Day: The Clarks - Last Call
In college, I definitely strategically placed books and other items around my dorm room so that they could be noticed and used as conversation pieces. I still put some effort into arranging my bookshelf, with my more visible bookshelf (above) holding books-to-be-noticed, and my less visible shelf with the less interesting books. Far fewer random people come through my room than a dorm, of course, but I get pretty excited when someone sees my shelf and says, ooh! look!
Somehow, though, I still keep a bible on my shelf. Although it's not personally important like the London and Melville above it, it still seems too important in general to not be on the shelf.
On a completely separate note, I get very embarrassed when it's the day after I was really drunk, and, despite any previous conviction that PBR has magical properties and cannot cause post-drinking discomfort, I am extremely hungover. It's not that it was necessarily actually embarrassing: I think it's simply that I'm embarrassed to be hungover at all. Although it happens often enough.
Song of the Day: Wilco - In a Future Age (Alternate Take)
Saucy brute and the diamond had a bunch of us over for a big dinner, with homemade pasta and homegrown tomatoes. It was delicious, of course... whenever saucy starts to say, yeah, I don't know how good this will be, I just explain to her what I'd be eating instead, and she quits hedging. The company was also far superior to most of my dinners, and I got to share some homebrew with a fledgling brewer.
Saucy and the diamond are getting married in October, and they asked me to give the best man's toast. (Maybe I should note that it was the bride that actually asked me...) Dinner with the bride and groom and their friends was a great brainstorming session for me.
Song of the Day: Wilco - Summer Teeth
Okay, it's [action]-story time.
So, I was driving to the grocery store, when I see this ridiculously cute girl riding her bike. Now, it's been a long time since I've actually seen a girl I could ever become interested in, so I think that I'd forgotten that they existed. This random girl-on-bike could have been one of those. It also got me thinking about how women get about 10 bonus hot points if riding a bike (that's on the (0-10) * (0-10) attractiveness scale). But I digress...
So then I start thinking, damn, I need to do something exciting again. At this point it was all subconscious, but I'll explain the cause at which point it surfaced in this stream of consciousness. So after the grocery store I start to get a sleeping bag and some food together to go drive up near Sedona and backpack and look for elk. Then I decide, wait! I know what's causing this! It's just like that Sports Night episode, where Dan gets writer's block, then gets it cured when he meets a hot volleyball player because he remembers why he grew to love writing in the first place... like Jeremy said, it's the same reason anyone does anything: for beautiful women!
With this epiphany in mind, I resolved to go to work posthaste, and do some Impressive Astronomy. But while biking in, I noticed lightning! The monsoons have arrived! It felt much cooler, even if it actually wasn't. The oppressive laziness of the 105+ summer was shifted, shrugged off from the city. So I biked around for a while. Then I came to work, and told everyone that the monsoons had come. So we began to make plans on where to go watch the lightning tonight. Then I decided this had to be recorded.
Now it's 4 pm, and I still haven't done any work, Impressive Astronomy or otherwise. And the red sox game is on the radio. Ah, well.
Song of the Day: Marah - The Dishwasher's Dream
One last shot of the ToN glory (hellmouth and frumpy... note that frumpy is drinking from the one and only cup of names). I will, after all, be reliving the experience for much of the next year. Oh, how I look forward to the dvd production that my friends will concoct.
Anyway, my trip finished up a wedding of the seltzer and the bringer of rain. Weddings are a mix for me, because it's fun to drink / dance / be happy for the wedded couple / see friends, it's also sad because, um, I'm not getting married. I always greatly appreciate those who invite me "& guest" because having a date makes weddings so much easier. Flying solo, I end up offering to breakdance as a gift for the groom:
me: but you have to stand there with me... I don't want people to think the breakdancing is about me... it's my gift for you.
seltzer: but what am I supposed to do?
me: umm... just watch? ooh, I know, you could do it with me!
He wasn't so keen on that.
The wedding was in State College, which was nice to reminisce (including peeing on a random building). But I don't belong there anymore. Really, that's a relief. I feel mature for having moved on, and I recognize I have a solid place in Tucson.
Only two years and I get to move somewhere else :).
Song of the Day: SR71 - Right Now
The ToN. An annual event in which more than a dozen old friends from college get together and... well, we do a lot of things. Here is a brief list:
1. Drinking. All involved are very pompous drinkers. Two of us brew our own beer, three others are pompous cocktail makers (one of whom runs a cocktail blog). However, let not our taste for quality indicate that we do not also consume great quantities. I transported 70 pounds of "Longrifle's Cactus Brew" across the country just to share with everyone.
2. Penguins. Just trust me on this one.
3. Competition. From canoe races to Legos to culinary battles. There was also a greased watermelon.
4. The invention of new words, and the resurfacing of old ones. Like cockholster. Nothin' like a good cockholster... Also see: pumate.
5. Music. Four guitar players, three fiddle players (one of whom also plays stairway, etc on her harp), two harmonica attemptees, and several who just make up their own songs.
6. the Seltzer. There is only one.
7. Fire. I lit myself on fire, intentionally and while sober. Thankfully, the fist-sized burn on my chest is healing quickly. I think all around me thought it was mostly cool, except for the stench of burning hair.
8. Semi-nudity. This was kind of a new one this year, and video evidence indicates that I was the ringleader.
me: You're wearing 100% too much shirt! Frost-Arrow! Come with us! [sunshine rider]! You're still wearing a shirt, what the hell! sunshine rider!!! Okay... it's canoe time. Canoe! Time!
frost-arrow (trying to drag me away): okay, let's canoe...
me: I'm portaging, I'm portaging, it's cool... ohhh, let me slip it down. Okay! There is only 50% shirtlessness! [lingerie warrior], you're doing well.
lw: thank you
shroom: look, you've got more than 50%
me: okay, there is only 67%!
lw: look, you won't be the ToN whore, because 50%, I mean... I.
shroom: If I take my shirt off, then...
me: I mean, if I have to, I'll take my pants off!
etc. (my version of a "scary campfire story" was to say it was a dark and stormy night then turn around and moon everyone)
I also spent the last week in New York. But I just wrote a letter to E about that, and I'll probably write another one to fiery ox... so you can just ask me how that went.
Song of the Day: Tiger Army - Outlaw Heart
